I know this goes far beyond a single parent dating. Whether you’re single mom or dad or you’re a family, date night is important. We need those occasional moments together, alone, When we don’t have to be mom or dad, we can just be ourselves.
I don’t know if it’s a single guy thing or just a guy thing, but the DSBF just doesn’t seem to understand the importance of date night. One weekend he will complain that we don’t ever get to be alone. Then the weekend we get to be alone we do nothing. The last time, this past Saturday, we were supposed to have a date night. We went to dinner and then were home by 930. He sacked out by 10, I was up until 130 in the morning pissed off doing homework.
Now, I have to interject here. My DSBF is a wonderful guy. But he has no kids, has never dated anyone with kids, and I don’t think he gets the importance of getting the fuck out of the house.
With my personality the way that it is I get frustrated having to drive the bus for adults. I suppose it’s due to the fact that I have to drive the bus 24 seven for my children, the house, etc. Ive had this issue in one other relationship. But instead of being proactive I just let myself be pissed and take it to the level where it ended up ruining everything. If there’s one thing I’m good at it’s learning from my mistakes, and I will not ruin things over this this time.
So I put myself together a checklist; Five things I have to do to make date night successful. I believe if I can stick to these things I don’t have to be piston he doesn’t have to be confused about why I am pissed.
- Plan at least three weeks out
- Get confirmation that the date will work from him.
- Find a babysitter.
- Figure out where we’re going & what we’re doing and what else is going on that we can do. And hopefully get him in on the process.
- Remind, remind, remind.
Next time we have an opportunity for date night, I am going to put these in play. I have a good feeling that this will make a world of difference!
If you have overcome this issue and have any suggestions, PLEASE! put them in the comments 🙂