And so. In the song of the week post, I had an epiphany…
Things are weird. I know, I know. There’s always something in my life that’s weird. And it takes me away from what I love.
Truth be told, that may be how the weirdness starts… Hm. Maybe I’m on to something… I smell a new post coming!
DSNBP and I have had our share of struggles over the last couple months. Our MO? It seems like we have it all under control and then he goes dumb (doesn’t communicate) and I lose my shit. No explanation needed.
But maybe it goes deeper…
Have you noticed that sometimes you have a tendency to lose yourself when you’re in a relationship? LIke, you stop doing the things you enjoyed before so you can spend more time with the person you’re with? I suppose that’s probably normal, but for someone like me, these things I stop doing are the things that really help me to be the best-version-of-myself. And that’s the girl he started dating.
Since early spring, I have stopped going to bible study, I lost my morning prayer and yoga habit. I hadn’t been keeping a regular worship schedule, either.
Plus we stopped playing pickleball (albeit that’s a seasonal thing) and hardly get a chance to lift together. That is a lot of the healthy habits we really enjoy that went out the window. And I can’t even speak to the personal wellness things that he hasn’t been doing. I really feel like that’s not a good thing.
I’m now on a mission. I’m bound and determined to find balance. Rediscover the best version of c. But How?
- Communicate – Tell the DSNBP that if he wants the girl he fell in like with back, we need to adjust some things.
- Prioritize – I could spend all my free time with my man, I do so enjoy his company. But I need to say “Nope. I can’t hang out, it’s bible study night” or better yet, invite him along.
- Form Habits – One thing at a time, but do it. I have started with the morning routine and after one week of getting up, praying, then yoga before I even touch my phone I feel way more relaxed and positive.
- Encourage Him – Specifically to do his own thing. And seeing that he has recently joined a performing band, I think some of it will fall into place on its own. Hopefully not too little too late.
So that’s where I’m going with it. I don’t know if that’s what we need, but even if it doesn’t save us, I will be at peace with myself.