BAM!

Thanks. Thanks for being persistent.

I am still trying to work out if it’s an act of God or simply a coincidence. Three Sundays ago I was praying for you. I was talking to St. Raphael and Jesus that I thought I was ready to share my time with someone, and if they thought so too, send him my way.

Then BAM!

You came into my life and turned me straight upside down without any warning at all. Everything I thought I knew about myself and my feelings and how I would forevermore approach love got blown right out of the water, thank you very much.

I will still talk tough. And deny all day long that I am falling for you. But (I think) we both know, JFTP, that there are feelings in the air. And they’re not just mine. Yeah. I said it. You feel it too, don’t you, tough guy?

xo

c

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To the Guy

Dear JFTP,

I like you. And there are a few thing you should know…

I don’t need you in my life. But I sure do want you there. I’ve been doing this alone for a long time, and I am 100% prepared to do it alone forever if that’s what it takes. What does that mean for you? I don’t know. I don’t need your money, I don’t need your help, I don’t need you to step in and save the day. The only thing I need from you is honesty, patience, and maybe eventually love.

You should also know that I have let go. Let go of the should have been’s, could have been’s, and what if‘s. I have this single mom thing down to a science, and the bags have been packed and taken out a long time ago. My focus is forward. I can’t do anything about anything that happened yesterday or 20 years ago. I am just hell-bent on making sure that my future is everything it can be.

It probably goes without saying, but my life is hectic. I know that we can have a hell of a good time together, I think we have already discovered that. But having a good time with me sometimes looks so different than having a good time with somebody without kids. We will hit the gym together, then play a pick up game with boys. We will go to the football, basketball, or soccer game before heading out for the night. And we will have to plan dates. That will just give us something to look forward to. 🙂

All that said, I like you. And I think you like me too; you kept picking me even while I wasn’t sure. I really hope that we can give this a real go. I think it could be great.

xo

c

How the Rooster Crows

So. I have an update on the dating scene. It’s still sucks LOL

I met a guy through a new friend. We’ve been talking for a week. Everything is great and all of a sudden, out of the blue, he sends me a cock shot!

I don’t respond and I don’t respond. After a while I get this “Did I do something wrong?” and I’m like “Dude. you send me a cock shot”. I get an “Oh I was drinking last night I’m sorry LOL” and I think to myself “if I am the voice of reason we are in a very bad situation”.

But all jokes aside, what the hell? When did it become acceptable for you just send a chick a pic of your cock with the excuse that you’ve been drinking. AND you’re over the age of 30.

Plus, have you looked at your cock lately? It is really not the most attractive organ on the human body. Don’t get me wrong, pussies aren’t real photo genic either, but I’m not the one sending pictures of mine to you. The pictures I send guys the same ones they get posted on Instagram and Twitter, so I don’t have anything to be ashamed of 🙂

You also have to wonder, when you only know a person for like a week, how many other women are getting the same cock shot? Is that the bait and he’s fishing?? I just. Don’t. Get it!

What are your thoughts? Have you ever had a guy send you a picture of his cock? I don’t know about you but I really want to see that shit.

xo

C

Ribs – Whole 30 style

Mmmmmmm. There isn’t anything that says summer quite like barbecued ribs on the grill. Smokey and sweet and tangy, messy and terrific with a big baked potato and a salad.

There was a time when I believed that my rib eating days were over. The rub needed sugar! The sauce needed sugar! I thought for sure there was no way to get this bugger whole 30 compliant. Until I did.

I messed around with this a lot. Found all kinds of recipes that came close but didn’t hit the mark. I wanted to have a balanced sweet/vinegary sauce that would really compliment the meat, instead of hide it. This stuff, it’s awesome! I mean, super good. It’s no Sweet Baby Rays, but it really holds its own and gives you all the pleasure of sticky-fingered barbecue! Here’s the deal…

Ribs

1+ rack of ribs (get enough to feed who you need to. The sauce will easily cover 2 racks)
large flake sea salt
cracked black pepper

Pre-heat oven to 200

Lay our ribs on aluminum foil. Generously salt and pepper the ribs. Wrap tightly in foil, place on rimmed baking sheet, and bake for 4+ hours.

Meanwhile….

Sauce

2-8 oz cans of tomato sauce
1/4 cup balsamic vinegar
3 pitted dates
1 tbsp dijon mustard
1 tbsp Ancho chili powder
1 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp smoked paprika

Throw first three ingredients into a high-speed blender and puree until dates are completely incorporated.

Pour puree into a saucepan and whisk in the rest of the ingredients. Bring to a boil then reduce heat and simmer for 15-20 minutes, allowing the sauce to thicken. Move to an airtight container and refrigerate.

Oven finish:When your 4 hours are up, unwrap the ribs, jack the oven up to 425, and let them go, uncovered, for about 15 minutes. Slather on the sauce and bake for another 10.
Grill finish: When your 4 hours are up, pull the ribs out of the oven and get them onto the hot grill. Start them face down, cooking for 5 minutes to get a nice crisp. Flip them, add sauce, and let cook for another 5-10 minutes.

Plate those suckers and serve them with your favorite side!*

*I made baked potatoes with mine. Using the oven finish method, I put the cleaned taters on a baking sheet and threw them in the oven about an hour before the ribs were done. When I heated the oven I rubbed them down with olive oil, sprinkled them with salt, and put them back in, rotating them at the 15-minute mark. They turned out awesome!

If you try it, let me know! I thought they were pretty damn good 🙂

xo
c

Chili Verde with Pork

Mmmm yeah. This here? This is the stuff, sistas & brothas. This is like enchiladas verde in a bowl. Which is a win-win for us paleo folks. No awkward weird cheese-sourcream-shell-less enchiladas. Just all the soul-warming flavor. And it’s in a crock pot! Bonus.

If you want to be really awesome, make some plantain chips. Ooooh damn. They’re like Tostitos but waaaaaay better.

You can use any ol’ pull pork you’d like for this, but I like to use leftover carnita meat from yes-moreplease.com. This meat lends an amazing depth of flavor to the soup. If you would like to try it (which you should!) get the recipe here.

While we’re on the subject of substitutions, you can roast some poblanos if you can’t get your hands on roasted hatch chilis. I’m sure you can use canned green chilis if you’re in a pinch, but I’m also sure it won’t taste nearly as amazing.

Without further ado,

Chili Verde with Pork

4 cups chicken stock or broth, canned, boxed, or home made

10 hatch chilis or 5-8 poblanos, roasted and skinned,  or a cup of canned diced green chilis

2 cups of shredded pork

1 med yellow onion, diced

4 cloves garlic, minced

1 tbsp olive oil

1 tbsp oregano

2 tsp cumin

Salt and pepper to taste

If you’re using a stick mixer, put stock and peppers into the crockpot and blend until smooth. Otherwise, put peppers and 1/2 cup of stock into blender and purée, then transfer puree and remaining stock into the crockpot. Set crockpot on low.

Add oil to your skillet, heat, and sautéed onions and garlic until onions are translucent and just starting to turn golden. Add oregano and cumin, sautéing for a minute more to bloom the flavor.

Add onion mixture and pork to crockpot, cover, and let go low and slow for at least 6 hours, up to 12.

Serve it up with plantain chips. My kids say it’s great with cheese and sour cream if you eat that kinda stuff.

Hot damn. This stuff is so stinkin’ good you won’t even know what to do with yourself. If you try it, let me know!

Also, it pairs beautifully with a crisp IPA 😀

xo

c

Building a Bucket List

I never had a bucket list. I was always too busy, to pour, too focused on my children. But guess what? I’m not as busy as it once was. I have a great job and I am finally making money. And my kids? They’re growing older, if not up a little bit.

Went on my first long distance motorcycle road trip Labor Day weekend. Seriously?! Everyone should go on a motorcycle road trip at least one time in their life…

I have been on a bike, sure. And I definitely love it. This though. This was my first time on the highway. First time in the rain. First time in the cold. First time for more than an hour. Not to mention my first time in Chippewa Falls at the brewery, or my first trip up to Grandads bluff. It was even my first time wearing a helmet. And every minute of it was amazing.

Then there are the people you meet. Everyone accepts you as you are. The dealerships are cool places to be. And the sights you will see along the way? Way cool. Cause I discovered that’s what bikers do. They ride around and stop at Historical markers and state parks and scenic overlooks. My kind of folks right there.

Now I want to get my license. My five-year goal is to have a bike and go to the 120th. Yes, comparatively speaking it may be small, but it’s mine and I will achieve it.

I’m finally building a bucket list and it feels great.

xo

c

Mmmm. Cookies

I love cookies. And chocolate. And chocolate cookies. 

But I have a great sugar dragon. When I eat anything with refined sugar I don’t stop. That’s why I had to go Paleo. 

Well, in the last few weeks I have fallen off the proverbial wagon. Cake, ice cream, cookies, and candy. You name it, I’ve scarfed it. Way too much of it. So I decided to make myself something I could eat just one of. Red velvet cookies. 

I know what you’re thinking; “What?!? That’s got to be the WORST idea ever!” Sweet and chocolate? Yup. Maple syrup sweet, though. And that doesn’t make me binge. 😁


So without further ado, Paleo Red Velvet Cookies. *Id like to note that I didn’t plan on blogging this recipe, therefore I only took one picture. I will update next time I make them 🙂

Preheat oven to 350. Place parchment paper on a cookie sheet and prepare ingredients; 

3/4 c almond flour

2 tbsp coconut flour

1/4 c cocoa powder

1/4 tsp baking powder

1/4 tsp baking soda

1/4 c beet purée

1/4 c maple syrup

2 tbsp cashew butter

2 tbsp coconut butter

1 egg

Mix dry ingredients and wet separately. Fold wet into dry. Drop by the spoonful onto the parchment. 

Bake for 10 minutes. Let cool 2-3 minutes then move to a wire rack to cool completely.  At only 80 calories per cookie you can totally enjoy!! 

Try it! Let me know what you think 🙂

xo

c

That Girl

I’m not going to lie. There were a (good) number of times I had to breathe “Just another few months..” in the midst of her and I arguing. There were days when I was glad she had to work because she had been snarky and argumentative. 

Such is life with an 18 year old, no?

Today, though. Today I sent her off to college. 

I thought it would be fine. No different than when she wouldn’t come home. Well, let me tellyou what. It’s a lot different. When she wouldn’t come home, it made me angry. And frustrated. This though…when they’re at college they’re not supposed to be home. That’s a weird feeling. An empty feeling. And a rather sad feeling. 

I’m proud. Bursting at the seams. My baby is off at a private catholic college. She didn’t shy from her faith while a lot of kids didn’t know what to do. She had most of her stuff together. She made it. 

But gosh darn it I miss her. 

xo

c

That Damn Phone

DS and I got into it tonight, once again over that damn phone. Then right on the heels of that I saw of the following on my younger son school website:

Wait until 8th  

What incredible concept. This makes it so “everyone is doing it” which eliminates parents being labeled bad, mean, or being accused of not understanding. Because sometimes it really does get tiring to feel like you are all of those things.

As I was writing my response to the post, I had a realization:

 There’s no reason they need more than a basic phone period. Sure, it becomes as much a part of their fragile teenage identity as the clothes they where and what their parents are like, but the longer you can wait to allow them to communicate behind the screen, the higher their chances are of becoming well spoken positive communicators. 

John and I were talking about that just tonight, as were the other football parents tonight. One mom said that her son kept telling her but she really likes me and mom kept saying the only reason she likes you is because you can’t smell you 😂. 

In all seriousness, though, it’s kind of true. You don’t get to see who the person really is, or what they really think. They could be sitting behind the screen rolling their eyes and tell you exactly what you want to hear the whole time. You can’t see in their posture that they’re bored, or realize that you’re hurting their feelings by the look on their face. And when you lose sight of reading people, you lose an important piece in the art of communication. 

But I digress…

I challenge you: take the pledge. Tell me about it. If you don’t, tell me why you think it’s a bunch of shit. Or too hard. Or whatever. 

xo

c

Fitting in My New Skin

I know it’s no secret to you guys; the struggles that I have with body image and weight. 

Loving myself isn’t something that I’ve been very good at ever. I still try though, and I think I’m getting better at it. But lately I have been in a funk. 

At some point in time while I was off of work my body decided that it was going to start stacking on the pounds. I went from 145 to 160+ in a matter of two months. Sure, I made some changes. I started working out every day. I started lifting. And I decided to try keto. 2 pounds a week. 2 pounds a week!! 

What. The. Fuck.

I can say that I am in the best shape of my life, as far as strength and flexibility. And I try and focus on that piece of it every day. Unfortunately it doesn’t always work. Especially when my pants don’t fit. 

So I have changed a couple things, specifically moving away from keto and back to Paleo. I can’t give up lifting, I love it too much. But then of course it’s even more frustrating because nothings happening. Albeit I haven’t gained any weight in the last three weeks, But I’m not losing any either. 

This is been terribly frustrating for me. I started a new job, none of my clothes fit. And I haven’t made enough money to buy new ones yet. So I’m stuck every day feeling like a busted can of biscuits, which doesn’t do anything for your self esteem.
So here’s to hoping that I can afford some new pants and feel amazing in my new body!! Thanks for listening. I’ve missed you guys. 

xo

C